Now, this is my true testimony about the voices claiming to be from God. Please read the conclusion at the end.
"Hey, Joseph. It's me. It's your God talking to you," the subconscious
voice spoke to me.
I was outside the Golden Bear Lair at Berkeley when I heard the voice. I almost thought that I was talking to myself, but the voice was persistently trying to convince me that I was not talking to myself.
"Stop doing that (or "Don't do that")," the voice said.
Thus, the voice continued to say that I should not doubt the authenticity of the voices until I became more convinced that I was not talking to myself. The voice sounded like Mike Kim (alias), who was a pre-med at Berkeley. I developed some thoughts that God may have been talking to me and I also wondered whether or not God talked to me. So, I decided to ask the voice whether or not I could win one Nobel Prize, and I thought that the voice was going to tell me that I was not smart enough to win it, but the voice replied, "Joseph. You are going to win three Nobel Prizes in physics."
As I started to worry whether I would have the time to get married and have a family, the voice said, "Joseph, don't worry. You will get married to a Christian believer, who is Korean and does not go to this particular Korean church."
Later, I started to worry whether my future wife would be a virgin, and the voice said, "Don't worry, Joseph. You worry so very much. Well, Joseph. Well, Joseph. Oh well, Joseph."
As I started to get sad that my future wife would not be a virgin, the voice cheered me up and said, "O.K. She will be a virgin."
Then, I wondered whether or not she would be pretty. The voice started to say, "Don't worry, Joseph. You still worry too much. Well, Joseph. Well, Joseph. Oh well, Joseph."
As I started to get sad that my future wife would not be so pretty, the voice cheered me up and said, "O.K. Joseph. Your wife will be pretty by the time you see her."
I walked inside of the Student Learning Center. I started to think about my Nobel Prizes. I had thoughts about the Nobel Prize to make radiation harmless, and the voice said, "You will get that Nobel Prize."
I had another thought about the Nobel Prize to go beyond the speed of light,
and the voice said, "You will get that Nobel Prize."
Finally, I had a thought about making a room temperature superconductor,
and the voice said, "You will also get that Nobel Prize at desert temperatures!"
When I wondered whether time travel was possible, the voice never said that
I could win that Nobel Prize. I guess that I used all of my Nobel Prizes.
As I sat down in the Student Learning Center near the Bear's Lair, the voice
started to talk to me further.
"Joseph. It's me. I am your God. Jesus Christ. Talking to you. Can't you see that I am talking to you?" the voice said. (I, now, know it was a lie).
I was at a meeting and a black guy, who graduated from Brown University, was giving a talk about affirmative action.
"You are not the only Christian in this world whom I am talking to.
I am talking to every Christian around the world. I am talking to every
Christian in your Korean Church. You see that black guy, who is talking.
He is a Christian. Go and ask him," the voice said.
I noticed that black guy was getting nervous as he spoke. So, I gave him
thumbs up on my chest that he was doing all right. He saw me, and he calmed
down from his nervousness. After he gave a talk, I asked him whether he
was a Christian.
"Are you a Christian?" I asked.
"Yes, I am," he said, and I realized that the voice told the truth. It was so incredible that Satan knew the truth.
The voice said, "You see. Ask him whether or not he is hearing God's voice."
"Do you hear God's voice?" I asked.
He said, "I hope that I hear God's voice the same way that Isaiah heard it." Once again, the voice told the truth again, and he did confirm what the voice said.
"You see, Joseph. What do I tell you? I am talking to you. You see that I am telling the truth."
As I was walking to the Christian Fraternity House, I saw Sarah (alias), a sister in Christ.
"Hi, Joseph," she said.
"I am going to win three Nobel Prizes in physics," I said, and
thereafter she was speechless. As I stayed in the student learning center,
I felt an electrical sensation that people were hurting and suffering. I
felt their griefs and a lot of sadness in their hearts after they all took
their midterms. I felt a certain shock that many students were not going
to make it to heaven. As I asked myself why God would let me feel these
strange electrical sensations of death and misery, I had some thoughts that
God was trying to tell me that I was not God.
The voice said, "That's it!" When I had some thoughts that God
was trying to tell me that God knows a lot more than what I felt and knew,
the voice said, "You got it once again!" Again and again, the
voice told me the truth even though the voice was not from God. It was a
strange sensation. I felt that someone was crying. I felt that someone wanted
to commit suicide. I felt a lot of people, who were really hurting. It was
rather hard to explain.
The next portion of this testimony will clearly show that God did not talk to me.
"Joseph. You talked to me long enough. I will not talk to you for another four months," the voice said.
The voice contradicted itself, and it kept on talking to me. It was quite obvious that there were many errors in what the voice predicted. I became more insane (and it was mental illness).
Walking along the Dana Street, I saw Adam (alias) and the voice said, "Joseph, ask Adam (alias) about how many Nobel Prizes you are going to win. He will tell you."
"Adam (alias), how many Nobel Prizes am I going to win?" I asked.
"None," he answered as he is riding on his bicycle.
The voice said in a childlike whisper, "He's joking. Ask him again."
"Adam (alias), how many Nobel Prizes am I going to win?"
When I asked for the third time, he turned his bicycle around and looked at me wondering what was wrong with me. Somehow, Adam (alias) seemed quite puzzled by my behavior and did not understand what was wrong with me.
Later on, I walked into the Christian Fraternity House and saw Bob (alias) eating at the table.
"Ask Bob (alias), Joseph. He knows how many Nobel Prizes in physics you are going to win," the voice said.
"Bob (alias), how many Nobel Prizes in physics I am going to win?" I asked.
"You are going to win two Nobel Prizes," he said. I did not understand why Bob (alias) said that I would win two Nobel Prizes. Maybe, Bob (alias) believed me that I was talking to God and wanted to confirm what the voice said. I guess that I have to ask him why he said, 'Two Nobel Prizes' in the near future.
The voice said, "He is joking. You are going to win three Nobel Prizes in physics, Joseph."
When I saw Steve (alias), I ran up to him and asked him to come to my room at the Christian Fraternity House. The voice insisted that I should ask Steve (alias) about my three Nobel Prizes. So, I asked, "Steve (alias), how many Nobel Prizes I am going to win?"
Steve (alias) said, "I really don't know, Joseph."
The voice said, "He is just joking, Joseph. He knows how many Nobel Prizes you are going to win. He is just joking."
As I looked at my entire room filled with Albert Einstein's posters with one quote for each poster, I read them and noticed that they were all evil and filled with lots of pride. I tore them down until I read another quotation and heard a voice of a demon. I heard either Satan or Albert Einstein saying, 'Strange that science, which in the old days seemed harmless, should have evolved into a nightmare that causes everyone to tremble.' I screamed and yelled, and I destroyed that Albert Einstein poster. I realized that Albert Einstein, a Jew, was not saved while I was, and I was terrified. Adam (alias), Steve (alias), Bob (alias), and the rest of the brothers at the Christian Fraternity House could not believe that I destroyed all of my Einstein posters when I used to worship Albert Einstein as a god.
"What's wrong?" Adam (alias) asked.
"Satan wanted me to worship Albert Einstein as a god. So, I decided to destroy all of my Albert Einstein posters," I said.
I not only tore my Albert Einstein posters, but I also made every attempt to destroy all of the other non-Christian posters in my room and at my door. I even destroyed my favorite non-Christian Professor Richard Feynman poster. It showed Richard Feynman as a god holding a lightning bolt. Steve (alias), Bob (alias), and Adam (alias) were talking to each other. I believed that they prayed for me and that they did not expect me to be that radical. So, they decided to call Pastor Yoo (alias) and Sam (alias) JDSN for help. They were all concerned.
Then, Pastor Yoo (alias) and Sam (alias) JDSN came to the Christian Fraternity House and they wanted to talk to me. The voice no longer told me to ask any more people about my three Nobel Prizes.
"Joseph, what's wrong with you? We heard that the whole Christian Fraternity House people are worried about you," Sam (alias) JDSN said.
"Joseph, do you want us to call the police?" Pastor Yoo (alias) said, and I noticed that he was rather baffled.
The voice and I said in a childlike voice, "Don't be afraid. Don't be afraid."
"You are going to be tested whether you are a Christian. It is going to be a test. I am not going to be with you all of the way, but when you falter. I will be right with you. So, do not worry," the voice reassured me.
I said, "I am prepared to die in jail, Oh Lord."
"Joseph," Pastor Yoo (alias) panicked, "there are many cases where people heard God's voice before they die or while they were hospitalized in a coma."
"Don't worry. Everything will be fine," the voice and I, myself, again reassured me. "You are going to be tested whether or not you are a Christian, Joseph. Don't worry. You are going to pass. Whenever you falter, I will be right with you." (I am aware what the voices said was ridiculous).
"Pastor Yoo (alias), you have the capabilities of destroying the San Francisco Church of Christ cult within a month," I said as if I were a prophet. (By the way, it never happened).
"That is up to God to do that, Joseph. I do not believe that I can do that," Pastor Yoo (alias) said. As Pastor Yoo (alias) and Sam (alias) talked, they decided to take me to the Korean Church. I followed them and walked like a soldier into their car.
Conclusion: God never talked to me through those voices during October of 1990. I know that I was inane when it took me four years to figure that out.